Buck Uranus, chief astronomer for the William H Carpenter Foundation in Nevada, believes the extraterrestrials are refusing to create crop circles in GM maize, wheat and other cereals because of fears of possible side-effects.
The scientist has conducted a major survey of crop circles created over the past five years and says he has not found a single example left in fields containing GM crops.
"In my spare time, I channel messages from alien beings," said Uranus, "and from what I've been hearing, these guys have got some serious reservations about what we're doing down here. One of them told me he's even thinking of using another planet for his artwork."
Thanks to the World Inquisitor for breaking this story. I don't know why it never occurred to me to look up sensationalist tabloid content online. The dude's name is Buck Uranus! Hat tip to Salon's HTWW. No, I didn't almost believe this. Pic by neo_der_stuntman